The best thingJust because we want it, doesn’t mean it’s the best thing for us.

You may want to read that again.

This point was driven home this week when I had a conversation with a friend. She was wondering how to deal with some “crazy spirited” extended family members. You know the old saying,”You can pick your friends but you can’t pick your family?” Sorry, Mom, I don’t mean YOU! Anyhou, convinced large family gatherings would fill her heart, she was wrestling with the idea of her unwieldy and unreliable “attendees.”  She dreamt of a large family gathering and, of course, that was the family she had to work with. Just because we want it doesn’t mean it’s good for us. Imagine hosting a family gathering where you issued straight jackets like party favors at the door.

I remember when I worked in corporate. I’d apply for advancement positions. I did it because I wanted it…or sometimes, I just wanted to be the chosen one. Honestly. I just wanted to be selected…competitive much? All the demands that accompanied the position, well, those might not be for me, but I wanted to be the pick of the litter. This addictive desire got me into tight, unhappy spots on more than one occasion. My ego made my bed, then I had to be the one to lie in it! It’s taken some time, but I’m so over it.

What do you want? Is it your ego or inner-child doing the begging – or is it your heart’s desire? How would you know the difference? It’s worth taking some time to think about, me thinks. Sometimes, our best information comes in times of contemplative silence. (click to Tweet)

Cairns w: silence text

Funny, but when we don’t get what we want, we feel like we’re giving up something. It can feel like a loss, but perhaps what we’re giving up won’t serve us or help us unfold on our journeys. Sometimes, what feels like a loss, may generously be liberation. (click to Tweet)

Egos and expectations can get in the way, they almost always do. They can be especially detrimental when they make decisions for us in our lives. Perhaps, I should have written more precisely – Ego and expectation can be detrimental when we allow them to make decisions for our lives. They are not the higher part of ourselves. They operate from a place of control and scarcity. Boo for them!

Today, the yoga instructor told us, “Don’t sacrifice your knees for your ego.” Wise words. Push too hard today – limp for a week. (click to Tweet).

I’m not suggesting we tamp down our drive and ambition, or throw cold, wet dirt on the embers of desire…no. Fires are good. Passion creates masterpieces and can be the basis of timeless, priceless, lovely delights in our world. But, when it comes to deciding what you want do you know the WHY behind your desires? Do you understand where those accomplishments will lead? Is that the outcome you want?

Did you think it through?

I’m always in favour of a bit of strategic planning – espeically when it comes to our lives. Yet, in my opinion, the door needs to be kept ajar for life’s unexpected, magical surprises and the road less taken. What the heck, blaze your own path, even. At this blog we embrace creative minds. So, it’s fair to ask the question – How could my pursuits be healthier, more authentic and truer to my heart’s desire? Tell your ego to take a hike and tell the inner-child to “Stop yer whining!” YOU are the one running the show. YOU are the final say. Be still, listen to your heart. It knows the way. (click to Tweet)

Create Consciously!



Michelle Andres is a writer and artist. She writes this blog to share tips for a well-lived life and finely run art business…just for you!Writer, Artist, Coach

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